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Top 50 funny quotes made by the president of Belarus, Alexander Lukashenko

2 years ago
top-50-funny-quotes-made-by-the-president-of-belarus-alexander-lukashenko

Alexander Grigorievich Lukashenko is the first and only president of the Republic of Belarus, whom the people have trusted for more than two decades. In the world community, the Belarusian leader is called the last dictator of Europe with a hint of his undemocratic rule.

 

He is also well known for the funny, rather sarcastic phrases he says. His phrases are immediately about the dictatorship, the system and the people of the country. Bemorepanda collected the 50 funniest quotes of the Belarusian president.

 

 

1.

It's better to be a dictator than gay.

 

2.

There are dictators a bit worse than me, no? I'm the lesser evil already.

 

3.

If someone is a lesbian, it's man's fault

 

4.

I ask myself what is a dictator? I don't understand. It is some kind of terrible person, a bad person. But I am not frightening. I am not a bad person at all.

 

5.

Belarus is not a superpower, but we pay a lot of attention to sports.

 

6.

Look outside the window. Do you see the fence outside the palace? Do you see any guards? This is a country where everyone is safe.

 

7.

I really like to play football, hockey, but more often I play alone.

 

8.

Belarus stood on the edge of an abyss, and I helped her take a step forward.

 

9.

We solved this problem in a narrow circle of limited people.

 

10.

Milosevic was an outstanding politician who gave his all to serving his fatherland.

 

 

11.

I promise that by the New Year every Belarusian will have normal human eggs on the table.

 

12.

We will widen this bottleneck and increase the birth rate.

 

13.

You will live badly, but not for long!

 

14.

In my view this is not democracy, but a zoo.... It was exactly what we expected, but not on that scale nor in that form. In a word, it was nothing but a zoo, you can't put it better

 

15.

If you don't have money for a restaurant, talk to a girl in your student residence. Buy kefir and a bun.

 

16.

Who drinks - better not vote for me, I will not be friends with such.

 

17.

Whoever drinks will not have normal children. We will fight this evil as the most terrible evil. And it turns out - he got drunk, accidentally gave birth, and you, Lukashenko, grow this child. And there are 35 thousand such children in our country.

 

18.

The Belarusian people took a chance and elected me President. This is extremely rare in history and may not be more.

 

19.

A thug only understands you when you speak his language

 

20.

As a child, I grew up among animals and plants.

 

 

21.

I will not lead my state after the civilized world.

 

22.

I worked in the village and lived with the men.

 

23.

The Internet is such a trash, in which everything is there and even useful.

 

24.

A philosophical thought has fallen upon me, so to speak! I just have to be in the center now!

 

25.

The uniqueness of the situation in Belarus lies in the fact that I owe nothing to anyone.

 

26.

For the sake of maintaining peace in the country, I am ready to sacrifice my own mind!

 

27.

Lukashenka cannot steal. Understand you - there is nowhere to hide.

 

28.

We will provide them with humanitarian aid ... with weapons.

 

29.

I went in - aerobics. They showed me there because I had never seen aerobics. I immediately said: “These beauties would be on skis!"

 

30.

I really love sports - this is my best quality.

 

 

31.

Why should a pensioner travel for free ... everything is nearby, both the pharmacy and the store ... was it in vain that they built?

 

32.

Our family has one, one and a half, two children maximum!

 

33.

You asked for rain - I gave you rain!

 

34.

We do not need such a democracy with hubbub. We need democracy when a person works, receives at least some salary in order to buy bread, milk, sour cream, cottage cheese, sometimes a piece of meat to feed a child, and so on. Well, let's not eat a lot with meat in the summer.

 

35.

Losing a teacher - the end, we will go drunk and bad.

 

36.

For the first time in the last ten years, on the night of 31st to 1st, absolutely all Minsk residents - 2 million people took to the streets. I didn't expect 2 million to be on the streets. I would also come to see this miracle from my forest.

 

37.

What I have not seen there in Europe! Everything is dirty! People rub against each other ...

 

38.

I felt the warheads with my own hands and I know that no one will take them off.

 

39.

I don’t want to talk about any Barroso (President of the European Commission), other goats, bulls and others ... Goats - they are goats ...

 

40.

Humanitarian aid is free, it is for the people, including scientists and officials.

 

41.

There should be at least warm water in the evening so that a young milkmaid can come home after work, to wash with her husband in bed.

 

42.

Well, a dictator, so a dictator. This also has a certain payoff. This is the last! Can you imagine? Last! If you didn’t come here, where would you meet and talk to him in your life.

 

43.

Determine where people should gather for rallies, especially oppositionists and other rabble!

 

44.

I am an ardent opponent of benefits. In all elections I usually say: “Down with benefits!”, And the people happily support me: “Hurray! Down with benefits! "

 

45.

Belarus is like a crystal vessel, a weak crystal vessel, which I have been carrying in my hands for two decades and I'm afraid to drop it.

 

46.

There are figures who go to jail themselves. They say that Lukashenka was imprisoned. I'm not planting anyone! I protect so that I don't go to jail. And he stretches out his hands: cling to his handcuffs.

 

47.

This is very Belarusian: first to do something very carefully, and then to refine it.

 

48.

Respect the Belarusian people, be patient with Lukashenka.

 

49.

I have heard that I am criticized for kissing the Koran. Erdogan was presented with the Koran, he kissed him. They gave me the same one, but what should I have done? Someone already thinks that they baptized me.

 

50.

We support them, we give money so that there is something to drink and eat.

 

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most-horrible-facts-you-didnt-know-about-lukashenko-the-president-of-belarus

Lukashenko has already sat out Brezhnev, the longest-serving of the Soviet general secretaries, at the leading post.


The Belarusian president has already said more than once that he is "full of power”. 

President Lukashenko likes to emphasize that he is called Europe's last dictator.

In one of the many - and very frank at times - interviews, he himself called himself Old Man. 

 

Batka in Belarusian means father.

And parents, as you know, are not chosen…

 

 

1. Political scientist Valery Karbalevich, author of the book "Alexander Lukashenko. A Political Portrait", states: "Lukashenko's greatest achievement is that he managed to create a special social model - a Belarusian social model, an alternative to those transformation projects that were demonstrated by the post-Soviet countries" .

 

2. Despite pessimistic forecasts and statements by critics about the incapacity of such a management system in the center of modern Europe, this model has been operating for 28 years and is still working very fruitfully, Karbala Vich notes, specifying: if we evaluate not economic, but sociological indicators, the level of support for the president.

 

3. “However, Lukashenka’s main weakness is precisely in the model he created. It helps Lukashenka to retain power, but does not allow the Belarusian society to develop. This is a dead-end model of conservation, Belarusians have yet to pay for the fact that we have been existing outside of development for so many years,” he says.

 

4. The union with Russia and participation in the integration formations initiated by the Kremlin are called by experts a beneficial project for Lukashenka. Aggregate support for the Belarusian business model has cost Moscow about $100 billion over 20 years, analysts say. Meanwhile, Lukashenko did not allow Russian business to privatize large Belarusian enterprises and periodically demonstrated intractability - as when signing an agreement on the creation of the EAEU, declaring the protection of national interests.

5. The 1996 referendum, which officially approved Lukashenka's proposed changes to the country's Constitution, allows the president to be elected an unlimited number of times. The referendum, which ex-speaker of parliament Mieczysław Hryb called a constitutional coup, expanded the rights of the president and limited the powers of parliament.


6. Agro-towns are a large-scale residential construction in the countryside, which started with the adoption of the "State Program for the Revival and Development of the Village for 2005-2010". By the end of the deadlines indicated by the state program, almost 1,500 agro-towns were erected and landscaped in Belarus, and about 8,000 residential buildings were built. 


7. Critics note the high cost of the project (the state program approved 69.7 trillion Belarusian rubles for this purpose in mid-2000s prices, but, according to officials, more was spent) with the low quality of construction work, the virtual impossibility for new settlers to privatize the housing they received, and the lack of new settlers themselves - youth from 

8. Belarusian villages massively rushed to the cities 15-20 years before the start of the project. Despite the rows of brand new streets pleasing to the eye of a visiting traveler, agro-towns have not brought Belarusian agriculture closer to self-sufficiency and profitability; the industry is still subsidized by the state.


9. In 2004, four high-ranking Belarusian security officials suspected of organizing the disappearances of Lukashenka's political opponents were denied entry to the EU, the US and Canada. In 2006, President Lukashenko was also included in the sanctions list.

 

10. The sudden death in 1999 of the opposition politician Gennady Karpenko, who, according to studies of that time, was able to compete with Lukashenka in the struggle for the presidency, is also called by a number of researchers a "removal operation." Karpenko suddenly felt ill after drinking a cup of coffee during a business conversation.

 

11. President Lukashenko swore only once to avenge a "political" death - when in October 1997, a friend and ally of the president, Yevgeny Mikolutsky, head of the state control committee in the Mogilev region, was killed by an explosion in the entrance of the house. The deceased was awarded the title of Hero of Belarus.

 

12. The press and analysts connected the arrests of Vasily Starovoitov, the famous collective farm chairman from Soviet times, twice Hero of Socialist Labor, and the Minister of Agriculture, Vasily Leonov, with the progress of the investigation. But officially, the customers, perpetrators and motives for the murder have not yet been named.

 

 

13. Lukashenka's personal losses include the death of Health Minister Lyudmila Postoyalka - she is considered the unofficial mother-in-law of the Belarusian president, Kolya Lukashenko's grandmother. Alexander Lukashenko patronized the minister, but sent only a wreath to the funeral at the Palace of the Republic, and the responsible officials, appreciating the sign given by the president, tried to leave the mourning ceremony as soon as possible.

 

14. The execution of Dmitry Konovalov and Vladislav Kovalev, accused of blowing up the Minsk metro, is still considered hasty by many in Belarus, and the circumstances of the tragedy are unclear. The explosion thundered at the Oktyabrskaya station at rush hour on April 11, 2011, claimed the lives of 15 people, hundreds of people were recognized as victims. Even before the court verdict was passed, Alexander Lukashenko presented investigators with state awards who, a day after the terrorist attack, reported on the disclosure of the crime.

 

15. The list of political protesters against the Lukashenka regime who went through prisons is in the hundreds. Several dozen high-ranking officials ended up in cells in the course of the fight against corruption - a problem at the forefront of the relevance of which, in fact, the once little-known director of one of the Belarusian state farms was promoted to the presidency.

 

 

16. "In order to maintain the status quo and stability, the authoritarian regime needs fear dispelled in different sectors of society. Hence the regular replenishment of cells - both for corruption and "for politics." In foreign policy terms, these arrests cut Belarus off from the European community: Europe is sensitive to the presence of political prisoners , every time such arrests turn on the red light, slow down the development of relations with official Minsk," human rights activist Lyudmila Gryaznova notes.

 

17. Tamara Vinnikova, the head of the National Bank and a showy woman whom Lukashenka called "our orchid," was arrested in mid-January 1997, immediately after a meeting with the president. Until November, she was kept in the KGB pre-trial detention center on suspicion of committing an official crime and causing damage to the state on an especially large scale. Due to health problems, she was transferred under house arrest (although there was no such measure of restraint in Belarusian criminal law at that time), then - on April 7, 1999 - she suddenly disappeared. In December, Vinnikova showed up in London, where she stated that she was in the UK in the status of a political refugee. How she managed to escape from around the clock strict security is still not clear. In one of her interviews, Tamara Vinnikova said that she took advantage of the opportunity when she was "transferred from the security group to the group of physical destruction." Until the summer of 2011, the Interpol website posted information about the international search for Tamara Vinnikova, then this information disappeared.


18. Professor Yury Bandazhevsky, one of the leading experts in the field of medical radiology, was accused of accepting bribes for the post of rector of the Gomel Medical Institute and arrested in July 1999. Human rights activists note that the accusations and arrest followed after Bandazhevsky's research on the detrimental effects of small doses of radiation on the human body became known in the West, and then in Belarus: the scientist's conclusions contradicted Lukashenka's setting for a shock revival of the lands affected by the Chernobyl accident. In June 2001, Professor Bandazhevsky was sentenced by the military board of the Supreme Court to eight years in prison. He was recognized as a prisoner of conscience by the international human rights community. Released on August 5, 2005, emigrated from Belarus.


19. Politician Nikolai Statkevich, former candidate for the presidency of Belarus in the 2010 elections, is still in prison. Arrested on the evening after the elections, on December 19, after a forceful dispersal of a protest rally against fraud. Accused of organizing mass riots, in May 2011 sentenced to six years in a penal colony. Five more opposition politicians who fought with Alexander Lukashenko for the presidency also went through the KGB pre-trial detention center, prisons, house arrest, but to this day they are at large (ex-presidential candidates Andrei Sannikov and Ales Mikhalevich were forced to leave Belarus). According to political analysts, President Lukashenko cannot forgive Mikalai Statkevich for his disobedience and harsh speeches in the media during the election campaign. Statkevich appealed to Lukashenka: "Give back the elections to the people!", accusing the authorities of falsifying election campaigns.


20. Human rights activist Ales Bialiatskiwas released in 2014, after 1,050 days of imprisonment. He was accused of non-payment of taxes on funds accumulated in foreign accounts. He pleaded not guilty, saying that the accounts in Lithuania and Poland were used for the needs of human rights activities. Even before the verdict was passed, the damage that the state demanded compensation was repaid by voluntary donations from citizens. Over the past three years, Ales Belyatsky, head of the Viasna human rights center deregistered by the Belarusian authorities and vice-president of the International Federation of Human Rights, has been nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize.


21. Student Anton Suryapin became known to the world after his arrest for a photo: Surya Pin posted on the Internet a photo of teddy bears dropped with calls to respect human rights by a Swedish light aircraft illegally entering Belarusian airspace. In August 2012, Surya Pin and realtor Basharimov, who somehow helped the Swedes rent housing in Belarus, were accused of illegally crossing the border, although initially they were only suspected of complicity in such actions. After a short stay in the KGB pre-trial detention center, student Suryapin was released and returned to his studies. The "plush landing" of the Swedish bears cost several high-ranking military posts and turned into a diplomatic conflict: the Belarusian authorities forced the Swedish ambassador Stefan Erickson to leave Minsk.



22. The American lawyer Emanuel Zeltser and his assistant Vladlena Funk in the Minsk KGB pre-trial detention center, popularly referred to as the "American", turned out to be almost according to the plot of a Hollywood detective. Zeltser and Funk, who spent more than a year in Belarusian places of detention, said after their release that they woke up at the Minsk airport after meeting Boris Berezovsky in London. In Minsk, they were accused of using forged documents and commercial espionage. The Belarusian press claimed that the arrest of Zeltser and his assistant was connected with the case of a dispute over the inheritance of businessman Badri Patarkatsishvili, who died in London, and Boris Berezovsky, who was put on the wanted list by allied Russia, repeatedly flew to the Minsk “American”, demanding that the arrested lawyer issue “Belarusian assets” "Patarkatsishvili. Later, Zeltser and Funk confirmed this information, also reporting that Berezovsky was present in Minsk at a closed court session. Emmanuil Zeltser, sentenced in Belarus to three years in prison, was pardoned by President Lukashenko in early July 2009. Vladlena Funk served a one-year term in a women's colony appointed by the court.


23. At the end of August 2013, the Investigative Committee of Belarus announced the arrest and detention of the general director of the Russian company Uralkali, Vladislav Baumgertner. Later, President Lukashenko confirmed that the Russian top manager was arrested after a meeting initiated by Belarusian Prime Minister Myasnikovich. "He (Baumgertner - ed.) arrived, a jerk, he was invited by the prime minister. He sat down cross-legged and said: this will not happen, this will not happen. He went out, spat on the Government House and laughed at the airport," Lukashenka said about the circumstances of the arrest. Minsk also threatened a number of other Russian managers and the Russian oligarch Suleiman Kerimov with bringing to justice for causing significant harm to the state and public interests of Belarus. A month before Baumgertner's arrest in Minsk, Uralkali announced the termination of sales through the Belarusian Potash Company, a structure created in December 2005 on a parity basis with the Belarusian side (before the break in relations, the company provided 43% of world potassium chloride exports). The participating parties of the BPC accused each other of failing to fulfill contractual obligations to use the common commodity distribution network. The fate of Baumgertner arrested in Minsk, judging by press reports, was dealt with by the top leadership of Russia. Baumgertner was extradited to Russia on November 21, 2013, in Russia a criminal case was initiated against him, including on the basis of materials collected and handed over to the Russian side by Belarusian investigators.


24. Belarusian businessman Nikolai Autukhovich, who was recently released from prison after his second term, spent a total of more than seven and a half years behind bars and was recognized by human rights activists as a political prisoner as a victim for criticizing the authorities and active citizenship. The once successful business of Autukhovich (he created a network of private taxis and cafes in the city of Volkovysk) is ruined, the health of the released Afghan veteran is undermined.


25. Ex-president of Kyrgyzstan Kurmanbek Bakiyev is often called a “Belarusian prisoner” in Minsk, although the leader who fled from his country was received personally by President Lukashenko and Bakiyev, who arrived in Belarus in 2010, long ago received Belarusian citizenship. In Kyrgyzstan, Kurmanbek Bakiyev was sentenced to 25 years in prison, his brother Zhanybek, who was once discovered by Minsk photographers on the streets of the Belarusian capital, was sentenced to life imprisonment. Bishkek periodically demands the extradition of the Bakiyevs. The ex-president and his relatives have cut off communication with the press, the place of residence of the Bakiyevs is kept secret, although the non-state press in Belarus periodically reports on mansions allegedly built by the family in prestigious cottage settlements.


26. "Prisoner of the West" is Zianon Paznyak, one of the founders of the Belarusian Popular Front, the head of the Conservative Christian Party of the Belarusian Popular Front. He was the first to tell the world about Kurapaty - a tract near Minsk, where hundreds of thousands of inhabitants were shot during the years of Stalinist repressions. The organizer of protest mass actions and a sharp critic of Lukashenka, Paznyak, was forced to flee the country in 1996, according to a number of researchers in the modern history of Belarus, due to the threat of physical destruction. In the same year he received political asylum in the United States. In exile, he continues to be actively involved in politics, regularly and sharply criticizes the "imperial aspirations of Russia" and the Belarusian leadership.

Most popular sayings of President Lukashenko


"If you don't have money for a restaurant, talk to a girl in a student dormitory. Buy kefir and a bun"


"He took the eggs - the milk was gone!" - President Lukashenko once talked about attempts to overcome the food shortage. He promised: "Our people will live badly, but not for long." 


“Belarusians are the same Russians, only with a quality mark,” he once said as a compliment.

Such phrases of President Lukashenko have long become proverbial jokes, but in almost every public speech the Belarusian leader adds a couple of figurative expressions to the popular dictionary of phraseological units.


Vladimir Podgol, Ph.D. in Philosophy, author of a number of books, including "Fundamentals of Political Psychology", explains: Lukashenka is moving away from diplomatic language, because his mentality is a scientific phenomenon. "A person has the genetic ability to awaken the archetype with further mental inflation," Vladimir Podgol tries to explain. 


Archetype is a term introduced by Carl Jung and used in his theory to denote the deepest foundation of personality, which is a set of basic ideas inherited by a person from his ancestors and defining his modern psychology and behavior. Inflation is not only an economic word, but also a term of social psychology. This is the expansion of the human psyche to the awakened archetype. At certain stressful moments, these processes are activated in the personality, and the person reveals himself to others not even by himself, but by the carrier of the "base" of ancestors. “This is such a psychotype, it was also characteristic of Hitler, to a certain extent, Stalin,” says Vladimir Podgol.



The Belarusian philosopher paid for the parallels between Lukashenka and Hitler 18 years ago. A fragment of Vladimir Podgol's doctoral dissertation was a comparative analysis of the mentality of the Germans in the 30s of the last century and Belarusians who suddenly gained sovereignty. The scientist also analyzed the mentality of the leaders of these states, and Lukashenka used quotes as material for research.


“I collected quotes that contained archetypes. My dissertation was taken to the presidential administration, then to the KGB, and from that moment I stopped being a doctoral student and I can’t get a job anywhere in our state,” says Vladimir Podgol.


Vladimir Podgol continues his collection of statements by the Belarusian President - however, anyone can record what was impressive in the speeches and interviews of Alexander Lukashenko.


The Belarusian president tried to disown this quote, spread by the German newspaper Handelsblatt, by telling the NTV program that the statement was "a fake, fabricated in Poland by the CIA." But German journalists insist that at the dawn of his presidency, in 1995, in an interview with the Handelsblatt newspaper, Lukashenka stated the following: “The history of Germany is, to some extent, a mold of the history of Belarus at certain stages. At one time, Germany was raised from the ruins, thanks to the very tough power known by Adolf Hitler... Not everything that was bad in Germany was associated with Adolf Hitler.The German order was formed over the centuries, under Hitler this formation reached its highest point.This is what corresponds to our understanding of the presidential republic and the role of the president in it ...".


However, it is much more interesting to listen to how the father teaches the Belarusians order.


"Every Belarusian will have a cup and crackling on the table!" (1994).



"They bought sugar, they got to the point where they started buying up vinegar. They turned everything into warehouses ... Now drink vinegar and eat sugar!" (2011).


"Why do you eat potatoes with meat at night? How will you sleep? Do not eat with meat - eat with herring!" (year 2014).


“It is necessary that there is hot water in the agricultural town, so that every milkmaid and pig-herd goes to bed with a peasant in the evening.” (2011).


"If you don't have money for a restaurant, talk to a girl in a student dormitory. Buy kefir and a bun." (2004).


"They reached the point of absurdity: what to do if a married woman loves someone on the side. We are not going to hang chastity belts on the corresponding parts of the body for anyone. You dispose of yourself as you see fit." (2005 year).


“Two boys? That’s good. And where is the girl? If you get pregnant, God forbid, and want to give birth, come to Belarus, we will arrange everything for you. From a Belarusian, from a Jew, from a Pole, we have Ukrainians, good Russians. Choose." (year 2013).


"I had a meeting in a women's team, at work. I tell them: the first child is yours, the second is also yours. The third child is mine and a little bit yours. One hundred percent the fifth and next is mine ... They are silent. Well , here, give birth. I can't do it for you." (2011).


"They showed me the outfit, to which I replied that I would not wear it. They brought green pants. How will the president of the country walk in green pants? It's good that they are not blue, honestly." (year 2014).


"If you want to say that your president should walk or ride a bike, that's fine too. I won't get rusty - I can sit on a bike and ride. It'll just be embarrassing for you." (year 2013).


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For some reason 😀

3 years ago
for-some-reason
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Just got it right.

3 years ago
just-got-it-right
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Unfortunately. 😁

3 years ago
unfortunately
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That’s surprising 😀

3 years ago
thats-surprising
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